!!

Is watching slash vids for school. This is why I love college. Because vids! Kirk and Spok and Firefly! This is already what I am thinking about! Now I get to think about it for a grade!

love love love love love = my brain on coffee and fandom

Fairy Tales

So, I started watching Once Upon A Time, and am now caught up. Thoughts. There shall be spoilers.

• I like how there are lots of female characters and they all manage to be fairly badass. Still, they talk a lot about boys, because Henry is a boy, so I'm not entirely sure if it's a Bechdel pass. Still, just the amount of female characters makes me happy.
• There are also boys! Graham had such an amazing accent, then he died, and I was sad, but then Eoin Bradley from Band of Brothers showed up and I was less sad. Go shows that have cool women and cute boys!
• About Graham's death: did not want. Not just that I'm sadened, but it seemed like a waste. I don't believe in killing characters when they could still to something interesting. His death seemed wasted as a plot point, unless they're planning on bringing him back. Which would rock, but would be hard to explain.
• Also Graham's death wrecked what I wanted from the fandom, which is lots of fluffy stories with summaries like "Henry has two Mommies, and they have a Sheriff, and he has a Wolf." So it's probably a good thing I don't write fic?
• Regina needs to be eviler. I think that she's evil in sort of a shallow way. Like, seriously evil, but we don't really see much, because, well, it's a family show.
• It really is a family show, but only for biological families. I am actually upset at how this show continually values genetic connection and disregards the ideas of found families. That just isn't how I operate, and also feel that it's slightly offensive to all of the wonderful blended, unconventional families that are around.

take good care of yourself

Back at school tomorrow, argh. classes don't start til tuesday but have to do the whole re-moving/settling/locating/textbook thing. not excited.
Well, yes excited, but skeptically. If given another week would probably be prepared to murder the parents, and that's not good. So, excited? It's all in the question mark.

This is me giving my self some advice for the next semester because I learned a lot since September and need to get my thoughts organized. It's good advice in general though, and I'd advise considering following it even if you aren't me.

ADVICE

• take care of your skin and your hair and your body. It's the only one you get.
• Don't spend time with people you don't like very much because it's convenient. I've met some great new people and have best friends who I love with all my heart, but there are also a lot of people who I don't need to share my time with. As an introvert I need to recognize that there is nothing unhealthy about being alone and that it's definitely preferable to being with people I don't like.
• Speak up. Be yourself. This ties directly into the item above.
• Don't go on dates with boys who could vote Republican. See above.

Also, fuck my wrist. I've been knitting a lot and using my computer at stupid angles and then babying it at different odd angles and it just sucks. I am like Queen sXe uptight about medication but really think I am going to take some pain killer before bed because it hurts like a motherfucker.

You can tell I'm in pain because I'm swearing more. Actually, I just want to cuss at my wrist like my dad does when the kitchen drawers attack. Only I'm afraid it will scare the cat, and we wouldn't want that.

I will miss her so much when I go back to school. She is my baby. She was created for me to pick up and carry around. Absolutely. Don't listen to anything she meows to the contrary. I am the person in this situation so I know what is going on.

Now my wrist is making me type weird, so that's all.

Stay beautiful!

Atlas Sound

So I just read the new Atlas Sound interview over at pitchfork, and my reaction was like, whoah, this boy needs a hug. I never realized my love for Atlas Sound and Deerhunter match up for my fondness for boys who clearly need hugs.
Atlas Sound has always meant a lot to me. I heard the first album, Let the Blind Lead Those Who Can See but Cannot Feel sometime in the winter of my Freshman year of high school, which was not a super pleasant time. I have really strong memories of listening that album repeatedly on my headphones during school.
My discovery of Atlas Sound is strange in that it didn't start with the music. It started with another pitchfork interview. I read that and it was like, yeah, this sounds cool, I should check it out. I think I had heard Deerhunter at some point earlier, but it hadn't really clicked. The way he talks about Lockett in that interview was very relatable, something I recognized in my own relationships, or at least something I could project onto.
whatever.
I love Deerhunter, and I love Atlas Sound, but in very different ways. Atlas Sound is headphone music, or good for playing late at night when the rest of the house is asleep. Deerhunter is more rock'n'roll. It isn't as intimate. Deerhunter wouldn't be out of place playing the background when you're hanging out with friends.
I guess that's all I have to say. The new Atlas Sound album Parallax is really good.

Nov 22

I woke up and 8 to register for classes, but really I was awake before that, because I have roommates, and they have electronics, and my clock said 6:58 and that is my idea of hell: Any time before seven.
But whatever. I have classes, and they are awesome. (I also maybe have class, but that is not up for debate tonight.)
What's changed in registering while having actual college experience is that I think about meals while making my schedule. What does this mean about my choices to eat things? It's an important question to ask. I am all for thinking with your stomach. My stomach is smarter than a lot of my other parts.
Like the part of me that decided getting a small mocha from Starbucks in Coffman was a wonderful idea. Because my hands were cold, but they are always cold, even in the summer. It's probably poor circulation, and coffee won't do anything to cure that.
It will fuel staying up late and writing, which is what I want to do tonight. Wednesdays are always tiring, but I don't care. I've just deiced to say fuck it, and struggle through tomorrow in favor of kicking back tonight.

yeah.

the past week and half have been both really stressful and really exciting. a lot has been happening. things in my life that aren't normal yet. that could be normal in the future, but are for now still exceptional.

it's damn odd how college didn't feel like a major shift. it just seemed like the logical next thing. I think maybe I was too busy to over think it.

I can try to be excited about finals because it will stop me from over thinking things. yea!

words

this is a note that goes along with the previous blog on justice.

I looked though some news stories before writing this, and none of them called bin Laden's death assassination, though I think that's what it was. I also think that western media isn't calling it that because it's assassination carried out by "the good guys," here meaning Navy Seals backed by the US government. Assassination is the realm of crazy loners and Serbian underground groups.

just a thing to think about.

"Justice has been done?"

this blog was written for my class Engaging Justice, but I am really happy with it and decided to repost it here. It's not my usual thing, but whatever, whatever.

In class last week we talked briefly about the killing of Osama bin Laden, and how in his speech announcing this development President Obama used the phrase "justice has been done," and how that's just a really odd thing to say. The whole line was, "And on nights like this one, we can say to those families who have lost loved ones to al Qaeda's terror, justice has been done." It's an awkward line, and overall not his most eloquent speech, but he has the excuse of not knowing for sure that bin Laden was dead until after it actually happened. (Unless presidents write these things ahead; maybe he has a drawer of speeches prepared for every occasion, which can be brought out and polished as need be, much like how newspapers have pre-written obituaries for people they think are going to die.)
In saying that "justice has been done," Obama used justice to refer to punishment. It was punishment he referred to in the same speech when he said that he "authorized an operation to get Osama bin Laden and bring him to justice."
However, this punitive form of justice doesn't encompass every nuance of the word. In many cases justice means fairness. It means that everyone gets the respect and resources that they deserve. An argument could be made that because bin Laden was a terrorist getting what he deserved meant being killed by Navy Seals. But for ordinary people, especially minoritized people, justice means being allowed access to resources they've been deprived of and respect they've been denied. It seems that it is this second, social meaning that we're exploring in class.
I don't know if America's killing of Osama bin Laden was just or not. I read a lot, but don't feel that I am informed enough about global politics to pass judgement. My feeling on bin Laden's death are well explained by political commenter Nate Fick (who's name you may recognize from the book turned HBO miniseries Generation Kill). Fick wrote that "His death allows the United States to focus on other core interests - restoring America's economic strength, developing and implementing more sensible energy policies, and reinvigorating America's relationships with emerging powers around the world." Now that bin Laden is no longer a direct concern maybe we could move further away from panic and conflict and refocus our attention on issues like education and the economy. Now that "justice has been done" for those hurt by 9/11 maybe now, a decade later the government can start serving up another kind of justice for the oppressed within America's borders.

3/4 mark check in, preliminary best releases of the year so far

• Fucked Up - David Comes to Life
• James Blake - s/t
• Dum Dum Girls - He Gets Me High
• John Maus - (really long tittle)
• tune-yards - whokill
• Grieves - (i don't want to look it up)

I can't wait to hear

• cymbals eat guitars
• Girls
• Atlas Sound

college life

Dear friends and internets.
I have decided what I want for my recently gone by birthday.
I would like a fraternity. They would be like my giant drunken homoerotic dolls. They could have names and I could make up stories about them and it would be awesome. I'd take better care of them than they'd take care of themselves. I could create a straight edge frat! It would be lulzy. Clair says she won't give me a frat for my birthday because you can't own people, but Frat Bros aren't real people. Duh.

(Really, you should maybe get me the Sims, or maybe some therapy. Or cupcakes, or comic books. Or nothing. I would be ok with that. I don't expect anything holdable from the internet, though I give you all my love and attention.)

this is hardly even a song so how come it's stuck in my head?

I think I have a type when it comes to cop shows...

...ones that are canceled in the first season. This revelation comes after the series finale of The Chicago Code last night. I have really enjoyed this show. It hasn't been perfect, but I know I would have kept on watching if it was on next year.
I want to see how they would have dealt with prosecuting Gibbons, seeing Liam/Chris being incorporated into the police force, and generally see more of these characters and this take on the city. It interests me.
Another example is Southland. I watched the first two seasons in the past weeks. (While Southland lives on, it was canceled, so it counts.) Watching the first episode my reactions were 1) this is amazing, and 2) I am not surprised at all that this was canceled from network TV. It's too difficult. Their isn't a main character. Not all characters appear in all episodes. I didn't even notice this at first, because it worked so well. Excluding a thread for an episode didn't make me feel like something was missing. Yet this is completely unlike any other show I can think of, except for maybe Game of Thrones, which is not really a relevant comparison. Like at all. Southland is really slow moving. The procedural aspect is relatively snappy and self contained, but the character development is glacial. We learn little pieces, but so far no full pictures. (Part of this is the low number of episodes in a season.)
Another cop show that I've just started watching (because it's on netflix instant, and the internet is offers dangerous suggestions, and because I only have three days of school left) is The Unusuals. It has a completely different charm. It wasn't canceled because it was too serious, or too...whatever The Chicago Code was, but too quirky and odd. It has too much character to watch mindlessly. One of the detectives started the show dressed like a hooker! Another pretends to be a cook! Another is pretending he doesn't have a brain tumor and his partner is convinced that he's going to die! Look at them, they're so not the normal tough badass cop cliche. They're weird!
And that's why the show didn't catch on. Network television doesn't want weird. (cough*pushing up daises*cough) And that's why I like all these shows, because they're not the typical procedural. So basically I'm screwed. But whatever.

STRAY THOUGHT
I had never seen Jeremy Renner in anything before watching The Unusuals, and this makes confident that he can totally be Hawkeye, which is very important.

Fringe Season Finale

I held off writing about this sort of because I had no idea what was going on. I enjoyed it, but it created tons of questions and didn't give any answers. The future was interesting looking. I wonder if we're going to see it again. I wonder a lot of things. I really have no idea where this show is going. Right now I trust them to figure things out and be aweseome, but the longer it goes without any hint of resolution the more nervous I get. Next season can not get here soon enough.

line

so i just shouted some at my computer because there is a frustrating line that isn't telling me anything clear. Basicaly A Game of Thrones has stolen my life and it's all that I think about, except that isn't really true, but it's making me sort of obsessive. I'm reading the first book along with the show, so I'm always a little bit further than the show, but I'm pacing myself because there are other things I need to be reading right now. And then I found this really, really awesome character map. And it is driving me crazy because, well, I just emailed clair so to copy and paste


there's a line between Renly and the night of flowers who I can now see his name is Loras
and the line has a star on it for friendship
only it's surrounded by quotation marks.
so.
um.
that's strange.
I have two possible guesses

ONE
they aren't really friends, just pretending to be.

TWO
Slash.

(end message)
and not knowing is really anoying, but I'm noting going to go googleing because I don't want other spoilers, and I don't have time to read more right now.
ARGH
Soon it will be after graduation and i will actually have time to do things again. I can't wait.

Chicago Code "Bathhouse and Hinky Dink"

This is was a very excellent episode but I don't really feel like talking about it because it's looks like this show will probably be cancelled which sucks, because it keeps on getting better.

hmph.

Castle, May 2nd, Observation

• sWhat the fuck Gene Simmons? Most random cameo ever.
• The movie versions of fake Ryan and Espesito were amusing. Fake-Ryan seemed pretty spot on, but it seemed that fake Espesito should have been more badass, and I'm pretty sure this is an actual criticism that makes sense, and not the result of rewatching Generation Kill.
• Their hotel suite was so pretty, I want it.
• No Martha or Alexis in this episode. Sad.
• Disolving bullets? Disolving bullets! I wish I had disolving bullets! (only, um, not.) Is it just me or does this show keep on getting more silly?
• The scene with the door handle and the will she won't she and the pacing was just great.

Lord Snow

Why is this show/these books so awesome? It's consuming my life. It's, like, all I can talk about. Someday soon I am going to start another sentance with the words "Jon Snow" and Emma is going to slap me, and it is going to be terribe.
Speaking of Jon Snow, he's the tittle of this episode. It's a very good episode. It was lovely. Dany was more interesting than ever. Arya and her fencing teacher were awesome. Getting settled in Kingslanding and meeting Littlefinger was great, especially Ned slaming him up against a wall and then Cat yelling at them. The Queen and Joffery are more humanized then they are at this point in the book. And Jon Snow. At the wall, being miserable. The wall is such a terrific setpiece. It's so fucking huge. You just sort of go "huh." Or ar least I do. Jon at the wall beating everyone at sword fighting because he's had experience and training. Tyrion provides some good perspective, that yeah, Jon's a bastard, and that sucks, but he's still had a comfortable life so far. His new brothers haven't. Tyrion is just awesome. Great lines, great acting, just great. I bet that if you had no knowledge of the book he would automatically be your favorite character, because he's the one who pops the most on screen. The television versions of Jon and Arya are pretty great, but Tyrion is just the best.

THE LAST SAM WEISS

Fringe's penulimate episode of the season and things just got extra crazy. Peter is unconcious, then he's amensiatic, and getting the universes confused, and I really don't know what's going on. There's lightning inside, Olivia's psychic powers return. It's nonstop.
And then Peter's in the machine, Olivia's the crowbar, and bang. Oh my god.

Do you think there could be more than two universes involved? That would just be...I can't really talk about this show coherently. It's blown my mind.

Glee is...

...something I don't usually watch, but almost always enjoy when I do. I'm not going to comment on the plot because I've seen maybe four episodes this year.

The song I liked the best was Kurt's gorgeous version of "As If We Never Said Goodbye."

100

THIS IS POST 100!